i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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