Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
