Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
