dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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