who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
