i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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