suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
