How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
