I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Even my vagina gasped.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize