We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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