ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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