Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
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