Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
