Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
