I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
