I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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