Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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