i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
