Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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