3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He? As in you personified your dick?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
