I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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