4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
