Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she peed on how many people?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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