Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
My pussy is not your playground.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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