I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
