Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
