if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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