Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
