In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
