Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
