So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
