So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
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