i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
