Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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