It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
