Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize