I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
