coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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