I wanna bring you to show and tell
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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