Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
