belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
