is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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