He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize