im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
