it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
