Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
