awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
you win again, gameday.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize