So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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