I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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