At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
